..pieceS oF mY brokeN hearT..

..dad..

2009-02-27T02:11:00.004+08:00

i wasn't going to update today actually. why? haha! well, i am having my Electrical Technology Exam tomorrow at 2. But i came across something so interesting that i couldn't keep myself from sharing it with you guys! nothing really that special, just a simple quote. one that really got me thinking. it just struck me to reflect on myself and my doings. what kind of a son had i been?

"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant, I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
by Mark Twain

well.. i better get back to my revision now. will update more on this quote in my next post. cheers!

..foreign Xchange..

2009-02-20T01:37:00.004+08:00

i have been missing-in-action for sometime now. why? no particular reason actually. i was spending some time revising for my exams and also "thinking" about my future. what exactly about my future? well, i would say about money. yes, that's what makes the world go round, doesn't it? so there i was thinking, how can make money right now, without working (obviously)? and something interesting came to mind. i have started reading the news paper lately and noticed the 'exchange rate' column. so i told myself, why not make some money trading US dollar. i know it sounds easy, but there's more to it than meets the eyes. i would need a certain capital to start off with. and in times of such recession, i can't just hop to dad and ask for a few K right? so what can be the next best solution? get the money myself, of course! i think i need to start saving. wonder how long it'll take me to get the money. anyone interesting in investing??? :)

..lonEly valentine's day..

2009-02-14T12:31:00.003+08:00

yo. before i begin, a happy Valentine's day to all the love-birds out there. i am happy for you people, and yet green with envy. why? i think it's because i'm spending a lonesome valentine's day. i have been sitting in my room all morning watching movies on my laptop. can i person get lonelier than that? i think NOT. yesterday was the last day of school-till my exams. so yea, no celebrations either. more of mourning about the fact: how badly we will do for the exams. sigh. suddenly it seems that life is filled with failures. an infinite quantity of it! dam! need to go to the bike shop later to get new srokets, chain and break pads. what a pathetic way to spend Valentine's day. only me and me bike. (*laughing at myself*). guesse today will be just like my birthday, i will give MYSELF a little treat, pretending it was from someone "special". yea i know exactly what you people are going to say. "WHAT A LOSER!" all i can say is that, that's life, my friends. a sad and lonely life.

lost admist a concrete jungle

..losing touch with REALiTY..

2009-02-12T20:55:00.003+08:00

where should i begin today? what will i convey? where would i end? are we really whom we portray to be? i guess i'm losing touch with reality. or maybe i'm in serious need of motivation! i think i need to talk to someone. anyone! i myself know that i am NOT weak. yet i feel that i need help. i have goals, dreams, plans. but somehow everything seems to drifting away from me! WHY?? why am i not GOOD enough, sometimes i question myself. i once heard of a saying: "only under tremendous heat and pressure, can coal turn to diamond!" but we seem to miss out on the fact that the diamond would still require to be polished! am i like a piece of coal?? i wonder. i am not usually this confused. but today, i'm LOST for words. i feel like a boat without a radar. floating on the vast ocean, without a destination. i feel so stranded. why has LIFE abandoned me?

..valentine's day coming..

2009-02-11T20:44:00.004+08:00

hello! 14th Feb coming soon huh? have you guys prepared your chocolates and roses?? NO? haha. don't worry, you still have some. lol. Taking about Valentine's Day, i don't what I'm going do as well. hmm. Any suggestions?? :D

Man, life turning into a weird experience for me! went to POLY today and got the shock of my life! the classroom was all dark with no one inside. first i thought i had gone to the wrong class. so i double-checked the level and class number. Nope! it was the right level and classroom. then a thought of being in the wrong BLOCK altogether, crossed my mind. HAHA! so took the lift down to check if i had come to "right" block. and YES! everything was right. the only thing wrong with the situation was that my entire class and my lecturer was missing. LOL! oops! :P i think i forgot to mention the fact that i was 1hr 30mins late for my lessons. HAHAHAHA!!

NO, this is not a BOMB!! hahaha.. just my EEPS project,
an Alarm Clock

..back and running..

2009-02-07T04:05:00.004+08:00

hello there! finally i'm back after SO long. have not really been up to much, just too tired to update. my LIFE still rather stagnant, if i were to describe it. i guesse that's what being in POLY is about huh. nothing like what my "seniors" had described poly-life to be. so if you recently graduated from secondary school and feel JC is too stressful, and you should go to poly instead, U'RE WRONG my friend!! very very wrong.

oh well, as for me, i guessed poly has changed me a little too. made me a little more studious i guesse. HAHA. seriously, i'm not kidding! wanna take a look at the new me? :) here--->

yeap2! dat's the new me. LOL! Now let me update you guys a little MORE on my poly life. IF you people still think that going to POLY is fun, then you people fully don't understand me yet. so far i have 1 friend who transferred to Serangoon JC, 2 friends withdrew to go NS, 1 friend transferred to ITE-Bishan, 1 friend appealing to Republic poly and a few other waiting to go SIM. if poly life was really as easy n "fun" as you have thought to be, students wouldn't do that, would they? I'll leave you guys to decide for yourselves. lols.

dam!! exams are coming up in just a few weeks time!! STRESSED!! don't if i can clear my Engineering Mathematics 2 this semester not?!?! wish me luck people!! I'm gonna need it!!!

with Love, AKM

..forgotten B'day..

2008-11-28T01:37:00.003+08:00

Where should i begin today? I'm lost for words, i think. 2 days ago, on the 26th, it was a birthday and i turned 20. But unfortunately it did not turn out to be a "Happy" Birthday. Why? Maybe because my whole family & my friends just happen to forget that it was my Birthday. Okay, maybe its excusable for my friends to forget, but how can my OWN family not remember?? Initially i thought maybe, you know, they were planning to surprise me or something, but NO! They fucking forgot my birthday!! :( rather sad isn't it? But guess that's LIFE. We don't always have things turn out the way we want it. So yea, after waiting the whole day i decided to abandon the idea of of 'surprise' from my family and decided to give myself a treat. At least i could celebrate it MYSELF even though no one else remembered the day i was born. So dissappointed, headed to McDonald's and got myself a McChicken, a Double-cheese burger, some fries and a sprite. That's the only treat i got for my 20th birthday this year. Pathetic!!

..inspriring quotes..

2008-11-18T01:07:00.011+08:00

Recently finished my 'Individual And Community' project titled: "Silent Tears" . And here is a sneak-preview into the outcome..

Now since I'm done with my project, i seem to have a lot of free time on my hand. Sometimes it feels as if I am a little TOO free. :) Oh yea, another good news. Just got my results for Engineering Mechanics Quiz today. And guess what? I scored 19.5/20!! wooohooo!! :D In-case you guys have forgotten, this is one of the modules I failed last semester. The amazing thing is that I still recall getting only 1 or 2 marks for the type of quiz last semester. hahaha! guess i have started 'to pull up my socks' now huh.. *grin*

Anyways, i was just surfing through the net when i stumbled upon this quote that really touched me..

"In life we all have an unspeakable secret, an irreversible regret, an unreachable dream and an unforgettable love."
by Diego Marchi

Something in me, just made me connect to the quote as if it made perfect sense! Don't we all have some secrets better left unspoken? Don't all we have some regrets that can never be undone? Don't we all fantasize for something totally out of this world? Don't we all have someone that we can never forget, atleast in this lifetime?? Again, simply some foods for thought. cheerS!

...back aft so long...

2008-11-12T00:46:00.003+08:00

hello!! lols! finally I'm back after so long. guess I've simply been too busy with poly. so why do i finally have time today? hmm.. actually it's because today was the dead-line for my IAC project, which i had been working on for quite awhile now. oh well, the presentation went rather smoothly too. i must admit it was more like "sent the standards" or "die" situation for my group. But we managed to pull the whole act together at the last minute.

Either than that, Life's pretty much a bore right now. For example i simply hate taking Engineering Mathematics 2. I feel as if I'm wasting my life away taking that particular module. yes, that's how much i hate maths! Furthermore, i know 'cock' about what my maths lecturer is talking about. Why can't we just take modules that are more related to our careers, in the future??

Anyway, there is certainly more to life then what people really blog about, i feel. So yeah, let discuss on some recent issues. Barak Obama recently won the US presidential elections. I delighted because i feel he is certainly a better man for the job compared to McCain. What are your views? Frankly speaking i feel that Obama has alot of work ahead of him, unfortunately due to how bad fucked up BUSH screwed up. lols. Come to think of it, could any one screw up their job worse than BUSH. HAHAHAHA! you decide. just some foods for thought.

had to buy tool-kit for my diploma..

this is what EEPS looks like.

wah.. dam.. i still don't know how to draw out this circuit!

..back after so long..

2008-10-24T13:10:00.003+08:00

hi people! so so so sorry for the lack of updates! it's just that I've simply too busy with my poly life. this new semester is such a buzz! i barely have time for myself. but nonetheless i guess somethings happen for the better. after i failed two modules in my first semester, i finally seemed to have awaken up. :) yes! i feel that i can concentrate much better now. and the lecturers too have a major part to play in it. all of us "failures" got the module leaders as our lecturers. which means we are being taught by the best in ngee ann poly. like finally! lols. but one of the thing that's bothering me is my time table. it SUCKS big time!! almost everyday i start at 9 and finish at 5 in the afternoon!! :( with 2 to 3 hrs break in between. dam! first semester i felt the schedule was too tight and now. dam!!! i got break till i want to commit suicide!! lols. :P here's a peak into my life now..

welcome to the hussle and bustle of POLY life..

want to eat but NO place to sit arh..

it not as easy as it looks like.. :/ trust me..

..questions..

2008-10-13T03:35:00.004+08:00

i wasn't really going to update my blog till the first day of school but a 'friend' of mine, Cahaya, asked to to answer some questions.. hahaha! so yea.. here i go.. lols..

RULE #1: People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
RULE #2: Tag 5 people to do this quiz and those who have been tagged can't refuse (exactly why i am doing this. haha!) these people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag back the same person. continue to play this game by tagging other people.

1.Do you have a secret?
yesh. but it's a SECRET! so i won't tell. haha!

2. Would you fall in love with a girl older than you?
why not? they are more "experienced"! hahaha!

3. Do you enjoy going to school?
Yes i do.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
i would invest the money and let it 'work' for me.

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
wouldn't it feel more like INCEST?? hahaha.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
loving someone.

7. Which would you prioritise first friendship or relationship?
relationship.

8. If the person you like secretly is attached, what would you do?
be happy for her. (sometimes try to phsyco her to break up. :P)

9. is there anything that has made you extremely happy?
nay.

10. Do you have any regrets?
Nope. life is about making mistakes and learning from them.

11. How do you think you have been the past 5yrs?
Bad boy turned good! :)

12. What kind of a person do you think the person tagged you is?
nice? hahaha! i don't know her well yet.

13. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
hmm.. married but I'll take money from my dad.. hahaha!

14. Who are the most important people to you?
my dad. my mom. my bro. and baby dear. in short my FAMILY!

15. What is your favourite colour?
Black.

16. Would you give all in a relationship?
YES.

17. If you fall in love with two person simultaneously, who would you pick?
NOT both that's for sure! lols.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing someone has done to you?
hmm.. I'll forgive but never FORGET!

19. Do you prefer being single or in a relationship?
In a relationship, i guess.

20. 5 people i have tagged.
Amber
Shazwin
Farhan
Farah
Joeybfly

..Hari Raya o8..

2008-10-03T23:20:00.010+08:00

hello everyone! a little late greeting from me to all you Muslims out there, and the rest, who are simple enjoying the holidays! :) so i couldn't update my blog on Hari Raya itself as i was simply too busy!! busy with what? oh well, my chores included cleaning up the house and COOKING for all the guest. there's officially nothing more tiring then cooking, trust me on this one. guess I'll just have to learn to live with it, since my parents decided not to give birth to a sister! hump.. furthermore my dad decided to invite over so many of his friends despite the "lack of labour" in the house. are your taste buds tingling to know what i cooked? just in a minute! hahaha! before that i would like to take this chance to express my sincerest apologies to everyone and "thing" i have wrong knowingly and unknowingly. "I AM REALLY SORRY OKAY..." finally, there you go.. :D

P/S: can someone please teach me how to make pineapple tarts???

..cooking frenzy..

2008-09-28T23:28:00.003+08:00

i think i'm on a cooking frenzy! hahaha! what did i cook today? hmm.. i not exactly sure what to call my 'creation'. lols. it's something like fried rice with sweetened prawn and spiced chicken. sounds weird? well, at least it tasted superb! :P dam! why didn't i just go for a "cooking diploma" if that's what its called. hahaha.
on the other hand, there's some improvement in my dad's condition. i heard he'll be going back to work tomorrow even though he still has a week's MC. yeah i know, but that's the bad thing about being an Senior Civil Engineer. The pay is dam good, but they sure make you work for it. and adding to my dad's stress, his design manager and project director is totally useless. know nothing about building and construction work in Singapore! i still don't understand why gave up an offer for a planning manager's post in a local company. at least he would have more time for himself and his family.
anyways, tomorrow is a very special day! it's my anniversary with my baby dear aka pink piglet! lols. i wanted to get her something nice this time, so i 'forced' myself to go shopping (something i dread)! can't tell you guys what i got her yet because it wouldn't be a surprise then would it? hehe~

fry the rice till it's just about golden; my secret.

..me cooking..

2008-09-27T23:44:00.003+08:00

yes, i do cook. and I'm pretty good at it! hahaha! oh well since my dad is going to home this week, recovering, i decided to cook him a treat. i don't cook very often but when i do, hahahaha! u better get your plate ready! :P but since i was fasting and was pretty tired, i decided to cook something simple yet tasty. so what was on today's menu? deep fried chili chicken and seasoned fried rice. :) to my surprise, it so happened that even my cousin came over to visit today. and he too was shocked that a person me enjoyed cooking. but yea, regardless their doubts, everyone enjoyed the treat! thank to me!! hurhur! nothing much happened today. to think of it, i miss going to school. haiz! the holidays are really getting to me. life just seems too stagnant! i wish my life would be a little more exciting. sigh!

..accident..

2008-09-27T01:15:00.003+08:00

yesterday was really a beat! had totally no time! that is why i am updating at this hour. so busy with what? my dad got into an accident actually. sigh. my mom woke me up at about 8 telling me my dad had an accident. almost immediately my eyes open and i rushed to the phone to call up my dad! the next thing i knew, i was putting on the nearest clothes i could find, grabbed my wallet and ran out! adding to my dilemma, it was raining cats and dogs and the morning jams are no stranger to us. it took me an hour to reach the place, in a cab. imagine that? a car had knocked down my dad's bike on AYE just before the Alexander exit. when i reached the scene, this stupid Cisco officer approached me. the first thing that came out of my mouth was that who the hell hit my dad?! where that fellow?! then that mother-fucker started babbling in his stupid Indian accent that no one knocked my dad and the had skidded on his own. how would you have reacted if a moron said that about your dad. so i asked his to his face if he fucking saw the incident with his own eyes! and he shut his gap!! no wasting much time own those shit-heads as i was told that the traffic police would investigate the matter, i rushed to the hospital. what actually happened was that the mother fucker driver actually did an abrupt lane change hitting my dad's bike in the process. not only that! that son of a bitch even those a tyre over my dad's shoulder as his bike fell to the ground!! which in turn 'popped' my dad's shoulder socket!! *won't go into much details as I'm afraid i will smash my laptop on the floor due to the fire burning in my heart!!!!!*
i was there standing beside my dad from 9am to 1+pm as he lay on the bed. frankly, i had never felt so helpless in my life before! all i could do was to pray to everything to be right again. it also gave me time to reflect on how i have been rude to him and how much he actually meant to me. fortunate the doctor was able to pop his shoulder back into place but there's still a small fracture for which he has to attend a surgery. when my dad got released, he couldn't even wear his own shirt or shoes. as i knelt down to tie his shoe laces for him, my whole life flashed past my very own eyes. how i would be nothing if he hadn't raised me and how still i am dependent on him. the first words i spoke to his was "no more riding for you from now on". as if i were my dad's father. i felt a certain responsibility in me. a certain feeling that i was not a child anymore. and being the elder son, i am not doing as much for my parents as i really could.
so please people. it's a sincere request from my heart, give your parents the respect they truly deserve. don't even take them for granted as they won't be there by your side forever! the least you can do to pay back for all those years they have sacrificed for you is to give them a decent amount of respect!! please!!

"SGE 6273 E" <-- this is the licence plate of that fucker! my request to the blog community: please break his side mirror, wind screen, scratch his car or even burn it down if you happen to see this car. please!!! may god bless all of you!!

..death warrant..

2008-09-20T02:47:00.004+08:00

back from signing my 'death warrant'. i had been called by the academic affairs department earlier on to report to school yesterday regarding the modules i had failed. so yeah, i thought it would be rather simple, they would just ask me to repeat the modules. but no. life's never that simple. i really wish it was. back to what i was saying. i was told to sit in and wait for my course manager and the 1st year coordinator. and that when it all began. i was told to sign the acknowledgement form stating that i would be DISMISSED if i were to fail the same modules twice. yeap, that exactly what it came down to. and the immediate implication where that now, i can never complete my diploma in 3 yrs time. dam! adding to the stress, if i were to be dismissed from Ngee Ann, i would to report for National Service straight away! now is that fair?? haiz. guess that's the price of having "balls in Singapore". and girls thing we guys always have it easy huh? and by the time we guys come out to re-apply for a diploma course, most the girls would have stated with their first job or even a degree. sigh. as you all can see now, a simple module is a matter of life and death for us guys. dam! dam! dam! why does it have to be this way? oh well, there's "no point crying over spilled milk", i know. but how am i suppose to focus and concentrate thinking about all the possible consequences if i were to screw up one more time.

P/S: if you were even thinking of going to Ngee Ann Polytechnic, do reconsider.

..result$..

2008-09-16T06:43:00.008+08:00

hi people.. yea I know, I've away for awhile now. oh well, it's just that i have been sleeping most of the time trying to 'hibernate' so that i don't go hungry from all the fasting. HAHAHA! I'm rather impressed with myself actually. It's the first time I have managed to fast for so many days straights. to be perfectly honest, i missed only 3 days. which i INTEND to pay back. :) i understand that fasting is a normal thing for you people, so why am i making such a big deal of it anyway? you must first take into consideration the background i am from. well, most of you learned to pray at a very tender age i presume? for me i only learned to pray when i was about 15 or 16 i think. i don't blame anyone? it is just something i had to overcome myself. i am the sort of person that will never do something i don't have faith or believe in. i can still remember those days in secondary school when this particular teacher i had, tried all his means to just get me to go for Friday Prayers but still failed. but eventually as i fought the devil in me, i started to change to be a better person. sadly speaking, i don't pray 5 times a day but it's something i really would like to achieve. oh well, enough talk about the fasting month, now to something a bit more serious...

i received my exam results via SMS yesterday on 15/09/2008 at about 9.23pm, and there it is..

Computer Programming = B+
Creative and Thinking Skills = D+
Electrical Technology = F
Engineering, a Creative Profession = B+
Engineering Mathematics = D+
Engineering Mechanics = F
Sports and Wellness = Px

remarks: GPA = 1.40, REPEAT failed modules.

to be honest, i am not really sure how to re-act to my results actually. should i be glad that i only have to repeat 2 modules for my second semester or should i cry over spilled milk, as to why did i not study harder. i really don't know. but i know one thing for sure, that i can't fail these two modules for a second time or I'm dismissed. dam...

..tests..

2008-09-10T05:58:00.008+08:00

hey people.. i know i haven't been updating on my life so much lately. but what to do? it's just that I've been stuck at home, rotting all day and all night long. really wish i had 'something' to do. haiz.. oh well, i was so bored that i decided to surf the net when i came across these so called "tests". not having anything else on my hands i decided to take them and here are the results.. enjoy.. :P

this is for you baby.. :)

$$$ is something that DRIVES me.. :P

hahaha.. I'm smarter then i thought..

Which kid will belong to you??

Nathaniel
Nathaniel is a sweet normal kind, he loves to play outside but he is very soft spoken and sweet.You are Normal and somewhat shy too.You just like to hang out with friends and have fun.

How do you compare?
Take this test! | Tests from Testriffic

my 'future' kid?? lols.. not bad at all..

what color is your inner energy?

your inner energy is silver
your a dreamer, you think up something and make it come true. you have a great sense of intuition and can see all possible outcomes before you take action.

How do you compare?
Take this test! | Tests from Testriffic

Are you good in bed?

READY TO GET DOWN AND DIRTY!!!
Your one of the best in bed! You know what your partner wants and how they want it. You love to try new things and love being in control when in bed (or where ever you might be). They beg you for more and they wish you'ld never stop.

How do you compare?

Take this test! | Tests from Testriffic

now this one, i liiiikkkeeeeee.. :D

..fasting month..

2008-09-06T01:27:00.002+08:00

3 words to sum up my life? Bored. Bored. Bored. life's been such a bore lately. Still around 1 more month for school to re-open. and I'm sitting at home, rotting 24/7. this really sucks big time! suddenly i wish my dad would let me go out to work. at least it would help kill some time. but that's not the worst yet. baby dear is also having school holidays, 1 week i think. which mean she can't come visit me. :( dam! so what am i suppose to do? i used to love sleeping but now I'm bored to an extent that even sleeping seems BORING! don't know why her crazy dad decided to take so many off days as well making the situation worse as she can't EVEN call me. sad, lonely, bored me. i was spending the last few days making a video but since its done now, i really got NOTHING better to do. only if i had a little more friends. then i would go out and have fun till the sun came down. sigh. hmm. what else that's going on in my life? oh well, maybe I'm going to quit smoking. yea, but still considering. why? let's just say EVEN smoking is adding to my boredom! yes, that's how bored i am. OK now, here's the video i made for you guys, enjoy.. and DON'T TRY IT AT HOME!! lols. the SPCA will get you! trust me.. hahahahaha!! :) cheers!

DEAD FROGGIE

..tiOman trip..

2008-09-01T22:31:00.003+08:00

ello~ finally I'm back to blog. haha! well, i did come back on the 29th but i was simple too tired to blog. i was sleeping all day and all night long. don't worry, as promised, i took alot of pictures for you guys. :) stepping onto Tioman Island was like stepping onto PARADISE, seriously! we were treated like V.I.Ps around the clock. and the cigarettes and beer there was SOOOO cheap compared to even main-land Malaysia. they were selling 1 carton of Winstons at only RM42. and 1 bottle of Hoegaarden was only RM6. can you imagine that?? hahaha!! but it was the snorkeling experience that got to me the most. it was really an once in a life time opportunity for me. the beauty of the fishes and the coral can't be described in literal words. the water was blue as the sky and the fishes took after the rainbow! oh yea, the beautify of the island also inspires me to write a little piece of poem. there it is.. :) and the pics i took.. enjoy....

Heart of the sea

Slicing through the heart of a calm ocean;

With the foams so white, dissolve into the deep.

I sit still as the rain droplets pierce my skin;

With the low thunders, waking the background.

There is a sudden loneliness grasping my heart;

Empty is my dark soul, I question myself.

Silence in the air for appreciation of the sea;

Unspoken are terms, used to describe me.

Slicing though the heart of a stormy sea;

With no one to turn to, just you and me.

us, boarding the ferry

too sleepy liao.. haha

people carrying our bags for us

the first thing i bought!
greeted with orange juice, VIP style
our bunk..
this is the way save our earth.. :)
waking up to TIOMAN

lifestyle of the natives there

can stop the monkey zhong?
monkey patrol.. lols
our alarm clocks.. :P

i fucking over-packed.. hahahaha!
safety first guys!!

sleeping BEAUTY..
and the POCONG beside me!!
night2..

our slacking-zone

cigarette too cheap! use for aroma-therapy!
cigar oso no kick leii.. now how?? haha
time to pack up!!

me EMO, again..

..lazy to pacK..

2008-08-25T23:57:00.004+08:00

its already 12Mn now, and i have yet to pack up for my Tioman-trip. dam! have been delaying the packing up all day. haiz! guess that is the only bad thing about going on a holiday. thank god I'm a guy. just pack some t-shirts, shorts, boxers, toiletries and I'm done! hahaha. maybe the thought of this, is what's been hindering me from getting started with the packing. well, i think I'll start as soon as I'm done with this post. i still have to wake up 4.30am tomorrow morning. alright, TODAY morning. hahaha. ok, let me tell you guys a little about yesterday. man, i was really out of perfumes and deodorants. so i was forced to go shop for some. (note: i HATE shopping :P) usually, i get my parents to do my shopping for such stuff. but since its the holidays, i decided not to trouble them. that is when i came face to face with reality. there is SO much variety of frangrace in the market that it is SO hard to choose something that you like. i'm not really good at these stuff unlike someone, if she's reading this. hahaha! yes, its you piggie!! anyways, thought adidas was a good brand so decided buy something from that company. then AGAIN, so many different types. and i was totally lost. so being the typical me, i bought one of each kind. HAHAHAHA! kk, i better get started with my packing. if not, won't be able to get enough rest for the trip. chao! :)
P/S: will take loads of pictures for you guys okie? ta-ta..

i can be a deodorant critic now.. hehe! :P

..empty holidays..

2008-08-24T01:10:00.005+08:00

this few days of holiday have been unbearably boring! to an extent, that i can feel the suffocation of being stuck in my room. dam! i just can't wait for the Tioman-Trip, which is this coming Tuesday on the 26th. on the other hand i am going to miss baby dear. i can manage still. but wondering how she is going to spend these three day without, 'irritating', me. hehe! oh well, talking about this few days. i have been experiencing some weird mood swings lately. which has made me even more mood-less. simply feel like stoning my life away. anyways, here is a poem i wrote. hope you guys can feel it... cheers.. :-/

Death

If I were to be gone, shall you not visit me;

If I were to be mistaken, shall you not shed tears;

I shall cry and pain, if shall you.

If I were to be gone, shall you not remember me;

If I were to be mistaken, shall you not miss me;

I shall be lost and wonder, if shall you.

If I shall be gone, shall I be never back.

2008-08-21T08:09:00.003+08:00

hi people. i am back. i know i have been blogging a lot these days. its just that i have plenty of free time on my hand due to school holidays. which is giving me time to surf the web and opening my eyes to the society we live in. usually i would just blog about myself and my life. but only now that i realize that there is a much more bigger problem at hand. it is the society we are all part of. it is OUR singapore. i am not trying to bad-mouth anyone in particular but just trying to put forward a message. a message of CARE! if we don't, no one really will. do you guys still remember the little presents we used to get during national say at primary school. those bags, pens and so on, stating "no one owes singapore a living" and "we must, on our own, defend singapore"?? i do. but looking at what is happening to our current society really pain me. there is a video i came across on youTube. it almost brought tears to my eyes. please take a look and comment on my tag board on how you feel. :(

..china players..

2008-08-19T04:56:00.005+08:00

i came across a very interesting thread today about Singapore winning silver medal in the 2008 Beijing Olympics. and here is my view on the topic. @ http://theonlinecitizen.com/2008/08/hate-the-policy-love-the-paddler/

i spent almost 2 hrs reading through all the post in this forum. why did i do it? how did i even find this forum at the first place? well, Singapore in gold medal finals is a big thing indeed! so i decided to watch the match. but, sad to say this but as i was watching it, i felt a certain discomfort in me. i almost was hoping that Singapore would loose rather then win the match. and every point china got, i felt better. shocking isn’t it? BUT please, let me explain. i am a ‘pure’ Singaporean, like many of you indicated. where as, my dad was an expat or foreign talent. he has been living in Singapore for the past 30yrs, i think. and me practically all my life. i grew up as a child here. played at the playground with the Malay, Chinese and Indian kids. ate the the coffee shop near my house. got into troubles at school and etc. i feel a belonging, a connection to this country. this is my country, my home. i feel safe here like no where else in the world, amongst my own people. that is why i can proudly hold up my head and say that i AM an Singaporean. BUT!! do you think these so-called foreign talents of Singapore say the same thing and feel the same way i feel about Singapore, MY homeland?? the answer is NO, my friends. the fact is that they will never feel the same way, and we have to face it. they did not grow up here. they did not grow up like we did. so HOW are we to feel proud of their achievements?? i myself am ashamed really to say that Singapore won silver medal in the Olympics. because we did not! the china players did. no matter how we put it into language, it would always mean ‘the CHINA and NOT the Chinese players won the medal’ for us. i hope you people see where i am going with this. and even for the fact to bring in foreign talent to give them citizenship rights, how can the policy really be so open?? the fact I'm aware of is that it takes i certain number of years to even convert from a PR status to a CITIZEN for us normal people. and yes, the government has the right to do do as to allow FTs or expats to integrate to society, in simple term FEEL like a Singaporean themselves. but this players are getting this right too easily, and i bet they would not VALUE it!! like some of you said, they are as likely to run off to another country if it offers them more money! i feel that FT policy is OK. but get the players here at a early age and GROOM them like many of you said. SO THEY BE LABELED “MADE IN SINGAPORE” AND NOT simply “MADE IN CHINA but ASSEMBLED IN SINGAPORE” or even “MADE IN CHINA, IMPORTED BY SINGAPORE”. and nevertheless, i really don’t see why Singapore is so dying for medals in the Olympics. for all i know is that MEDALS ARE NOT BRINGING DOWN FUEL PRICE OR THE COST OF LIVING here!!! fine if you are happy the way your life is, at least care to look at the aunties or uncles who collect cans from litter bins everyday to make ends meet. can’t all the money spent on these CHINA-PLAYERS be channeled to help them????? have a heart, make a change.

..finally exams are over..

2008-08-18T20:29:00.003+08:00

finally exams are over! had my last paper, engineering mechanics, today. i did not get to sleep last night as i spent my time burning mid-night oil. and the worse thing is that my paper was not that fantastic either. although i did manage to do some of the questions. what more can i say? i am already prepared to repeat at least one module. it would certainly be amazing, or rather astonishing if i manage to clear all my modules this semester. oh well, lets talk a little about today. i reached home at about 11am or 12nn i think. which is considered 'super' early! lols. why? lets just say i made some misjudgement in choosing some of my friends. but that is another story altogether. let me save it for another day. so took i quick nap after reaching home. the little piglet woke me up about 3pm, i think. dragged myself to the shower. then went to meet her at about 5pm as she wanted to try the new MARLBORO MINT i had bought from Malaysia. ha ha! she was a 'nube' at it! almost got 'maboke'(dizzy) at half-stick!! i wanted to laugh my ass off! but must give her some face ma. hahahaha! anyway, we also went to Burger King to have a very very late lunch. don't they just make the best burgers?? and the biggest too!! *drooling* wooohooo!! after seeing the pictures you guys will know what i mean...

stay away from my side of the table!

yummy! yum! yum!

after taking a HUGE biteeZ..

..busy! busy! busy!..

2008-08-17T16:21:00.005+08:00

its been a while since my last post huh? what to do? i have been too busy preparing for my exams that i never got any time to blog. i spent 48hrs straight, locked up in my room, preparing for my maths exam(with no sleep at all!). yet i barely managed to do the paper! imagine how i feel? dam! my eltech paper was another mess? i wanted to study for it, but gave up half-way. too many chapters to cover! it seemed simply impossible! sigh.. i am going to flunk my eltech for sure! forget that. woke up 12++ this morning and went for breakfast (at a time when Singaporeans usually eat lunch). drank a cup of tea and smoked a few sticks. guess my mind was still asleep from last night's trip to Malaysia. haha.. bought a weird brand of Marlboro. lols. 'Marlboro Fresh Mint'. Not bad at all. but the trip was not really as fun as i expected. all my friends were still working and i left early too, as i wanted to have a good rest before i started my revisions. dam! it is already 4.30pm now and i haven started studying for my engmech paper tomorrow. really hope i have sufficient time. alright then, i better be going now. loads to cover!! chao.. :)

nothing goes better with a cup of tea in the morning.. a pack of cigarette!

introducing.. Marlboro Fresh Mint!!!

!!exams coming!!

2008-08-12T10:07:00.003+08:00

dam! dam! dam! today is already Tuesday, i have only 3 more days to my exam!! ok, finally i am starting to feel the pain up my butt! haha! fine, enough of jokes. back to the topic. yea, i have been spending the last few hours mugging for my maths. i woke up 5+ this morning i think, and have been studying since. dam these 'complex numbers'! they are making my spin!! wooooHooooo.. come to think of it, i only have 3 examinable modules. maths, engineering mechanics and electrical technology. and yet i have SOOO much to study!! i can literally feel the cold of sweats appearing on my forehead now. i really hope i can cover all the topics in this short span of time. by hook or by crook, i have to pass all my modules. why you say? well, let's just say someone promised me a new bike if i did. :) oh well, and it's for my own good too. hmm.. i better go now, still got loads more to study! ta-ta..

..Fantastic Friday..

2008-08-09T04:41:00.005+08:00

wooohooo! today was simply the greatest!! i got to go swimming with my piglet. haha! (although i can't swim). baby was afraid i would oversleep again so she woke me up pretty early today. but lazy me, i fell asleep again. lucky me, i managed to wake up on time. took a quick shower and left for jurong east swimming complex. it has been ages since i last went swimming. but it turned out to be a really relaxing and soothing experience, and i really needed it. but the bad part of it was waiting for all of baby's friends to arrive. otherwise, it was dam fun! me and baby also spent alot of time in the water. (hugging and kissing) =p but.. good times are always short-lived. i had to rush back to school, to submit the written report for my c++ programing project. and something 'fucked up' happened on my way to school. dam! lols. k, here is the details of the incident.. i was at the filter lane next to bukit timah market waiting to turn right to beauty world and the traffic was killing me. so much on-coming vehicle that i simple couldn't turn out of the filter lane. and the stupid car behind me kept honking. i kept my cool at first. but soon lost my composure and turned back to glare at him. that is when he made some angry gestures. which really pissed me off big time! i turned back, switched off the engine and got down from my bike and approached his car. i saw a 'stuPIG' ang moh sitting inside. i started to shouted at him and he responded, still in this car.(i don't think he could hear me as i couldn't hear him either) but the gestures told everything. at a point i gestured to lower his window and i could see the fear in his eyes. that fat, white pig got really scared when i asked his to bring his window down. and i was prepared to give his a heavy punch on his fat face! he really made my blood boil man! did he think i was that free?! come on, i also had to rush back to school to submit my project! come to think of it, he deserved it! stupid, fat pig!! anyways, before i end today, here are some pictures i took with my princess...

..tired of sleeping..

2008-08-05T01:53:00.004+08:00

today was dam boring too! baby woke me up at about 9 or 10 i think, to tell me she wanted to meet me. didn't even go to school today. was only supose to have math lecture from 3-4pm. wat a waste of time! half the time i don't even know what the lecturer talking about. shit! 2 more weeks to exams! starting to feel the pinch now. better start my revisions early this time. oh yea, i still have pratical test for computer programming this coming wednesday. must study! must study! haha. oh well, had alot of time on my hands today. so i designed a blogskin for my baby. and also wrote a poem. want to have a look? here goes nothing.. =)

Unloved

if you shall hit a tree, it shall still serve you;

there i planted a seed of love, you never cared;

the flowers all cried to death, you never looked.

my friend, my flowers were without thorn.

like bees collect honey in their hives,

i collected love for you in this heart;

yet you refused the pieces of my heart.

my friend, my honey was pure.

gave you my thought of love;

yet my tune was without sorrow.

..sundays sucks!..

2008-08-03T23:29:00.005+08:00

is it just me? or does Sundays always suck big time? lols. either ways, today was a really really boring day! i woke at 5 i think, in the afternoon. haha! gotcha! yea, i had gone to Malaysia the night before came back around 6+ in the morning. come to think of it, visiting Malaysia is a daily ordeal for me now. times like these when petrol prices are soaring rocket high and cigarettes more expensive then 'gold bars', Malaysia is the only place people like me can turn to. personally for me, i always and i mean always look forward to my trip there! not only does the food and cigarettes there taste better than in Singapore, its cheaper too! haha. i know what you guys are thinking, taste of cigarette? oh well, if you are a as heavy smoker as i am, taste does play a major role. (i'm smiling to myself now) i have been to Malaysia so many times and so often that i even made some really good friends there! you know, although my friends there don't have a luxurious and extravagant life as us Singaporeans here, its still very fun, nice and some sort of cosy. =) yeap2, next time i go there, which is real soon, i will take some pictures for you guys.

this is how often i visit Malaysia

p/s: i miss my 'winstons'

..beauty is pixel deep..

2008-08-02T01:19:00.006+08:00

hi there. its me again. hows everything? well, for me, my life has been pretty much stagnant these few days. nothing much going on at school either. so what should i talk about today? well, there is something that i recently realised that i wanted to share. it's about blogs. usually people would relate to blogs with obscenity, hatred, love, complaints, wining, experiences and so on. but giving it a second thought, having a blog has changed me into something new, completely. it has given me new perspective to things, situations and people. i, now, see the world in different way. i have to started to give things second thoughts. and there is this craving in myself to share the 'beauty' of things with the rest of the world. for example, today i was with my baby when i caught a glimpse of the 'sun setting'. and that is exactly when the particular feeling kicked in.

who haven't seen the sun setting right? but have you guys given the sight a second thought and took a moment to absorb its beauty? i know i haven't, before. which i did today. and i took a picture of it too to share the "beauty that is pixel deep".

an awesome spectacle

..sleepless nights..

2008-07-30T01:34:00.009+08:00

dam. it's been 27 hours since i last slept. and finally my CATS project is done! the prsentetation went rather well i must say. everyones' eyes were glued onto the screen as i played my video. haha! felt rather pround of myself at that moment. and how could they not be. hell it was funny! hahaha! before i forget, i would like to thank my smoking kakis, sherman, jerome, fabian, yanxing(don't know how to spell) & weiru for really helping me with the video. without you guys it would never have been possible! really, thank you from the bottom of my heart! you guys contributed as if it was your own project.

Which bring me to my next point. Don't you guys agree that its very very very hard to find true friends?? lucky me that i manage to find some in my polytecnic. it's a good thing i realised who my real friends are before i got screwed real bad. lols.
well, let me elaborate. i was unlucky enough to be grouped with a band of retards! not only retards but lazy ones too! too unproductive!! so ei decided to change group and do with my project with a group of girls. lols. i thought i would let the girls to all the work and have some time to slack. i was shocked to find myself even worse off. not only were they pushing all the work to me, they were dam unreasonble and not even free to meet up for the project itself! dam! dam! dam! lols. that is when i decided to do the project myself. but i found myself in a very difficult position. althought i that decided on the idea to move forward with, i had a extream shortage of man-power. i couldn't find any actors for my video ducumentary and decided to seek the help of my classmates/"so-called" friends. thinking about it just pisses me off!! earlier they had pretented to be my buddies and promised to help. but when it came down to work itself, all of them were half-hearted. fuck all off you! if you guys don't really want to help then fucking say it from the start man! i had almost lost all home when..
my smoking kakis, sherman and gang came forward to help. what sherman did made me realise two very critical things. first, true friends are hard to come by and life is too short for gudges! well, that's another story. so let me continue. they ACTUALLY stayed back till 7+ after school on days just so that i could finish up with the project. and not only that sherman even gave me ideas for the clips and added humour into the video. that when we realised his 'hidden' talent. lols.
well, enough said. really can't hold my eyes any longer. i would leave by showing you guys my video and also intro you people to my smoking kakis.

Siliang, Weiru, Sherman & me

Jerome, me, Siliang & Sherman

Students Misunderstood! enjoy.. =p

..mondaY bluEs..

2008-07-28T09:40:00.008+08:00

its 9.40 and i just reached class. dam, I'm sleepy! yawn.. having engineering mechanic now. the subject sounds interesting no? don't be surprised but the lecturer is as dead as a dead horse! lols. now that injected a decent dose of humour into my veins. hahaha! god, i'm laughing by myself now. all my friends aren't here yet. wouldn't really be blogging if they were here. guess they are skipping lessons again. that brings me to my next topic. Ngee Ann Poly is actually one of the more strict polytechnics in Singapore. Yet why students still skip lectures and tutorial? haha. maybe that should put a rough idea of how boring lessons are here! hmm.. will leave you guys with some sneak peaks again.. well, till next time.. =)

good student? nay, they're either gaming or on msn..

lecturer stoning.. while we chat among ourselves..

at "eltech" laboratory..

me messing around with the system! lols.

..trapped sUnday..

2008-07-27T18:25:00.009+08:00

hello there! today Sunday. i bright and colourful day to look forward to, since its a holiday. a day to cut out from the rest of the world and just enjoy ourselves. oh well, not if you a project due the following week! hump! before i went to poly, i was encouraged by colourful promised that poly would be a splendid experience with no homework and teachers to nag at you. but i think not! poly has certainly made my life take 360degree turn, if you know what i mean. sorry i can't elaborate much but there's a sneak peak into what I've been up to the whole day...

this is what it takes to produce a good project

"multi-tasking" on my laptop

a sneak preview into the end-product..

..welc0me tO my liFe..

2008-07-27T01:11:00.000+08:00

aloha! haha! finally I've got my blog all running, all thanks to my darling baby dear. hmm, feels a little weird i must say. the last time i blogged was almost 6 years back. a time when i was only 14, i think. lols. oh well, let's put the past aside and let bygones be bygones (not really sure if it's spelt that way). since it's my first post, i guess i should elaborate a little on myself. I'm currently studying at Ngee Ann Poly in Electrical Engineering. i don't really have much friends as school even though I'm rather outgoing and well-natured. contradicting? well.. i must say i simply find it very hard to trust others. its not really the fault of "others" but much to do with myself. what's next? hobbies? hahahha! i only have 1 hobby/interest/love/addiction, that is smoking! my life seems to trapped in those little boxes. even to an extent that i have started to consider as a past of me. oh well, guess i'll stop here for today. if not i'll go on and on.. hahaha!! leaving you guys with sneak peaks of my life. watch out for my next post!!

my life trapped in this little boxes..